


You Cut Too?

by Tonystarkisaslut



Series: Tumblr Prompts [77]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-05-16 12:47:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19318495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tonystarkisaslut/pseuds/Tonystarkisaslut
Summary: anonymous asked:So this one might be a bit hard to write so don't feel like you have to ! (You can do it non-graphic if it's easier) .... Tony discovers Peter is self harming and to help him start to recover he shows him his own scars that no one know about. Lots of trust and crying between them and promises to always be there for each other.





	1. Chapter 1

_You could have saved him._

One glide of the knife across his wrist.

_You should have taken that bullet._

Another.

_You should be dead, and he should be alive._

And another.

_You’re never going to be good enough to make up for your mistakes._

He hisses in pain as this one is deeper than the others.

_You will die worthless._

Blood drips onto the shower floor, making obscenely loud _plomp_ noises when it meets the tile. Peter is shaking violently, watching his cuts bleed down his palm.

He takes a deep breath, watching the cuts heal in front of his eyes. He nods to himself, then cleans the knife, then puts it through the dishwasher.

He goes to his room, glad May isn’t home so he can cry in his bed.

_I’m so sorry, Uncle Ben. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you. I’m sorry I didn’t throw myself in front of the bullet for you. I’m sorry I’m useless. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry._

~

Peter takes a knife from the knife block, holding it to his wrist. It’s 4:30 am. He has plenty of time to get this done before Steve wakes up.

He’s spending the weekend at the tower. He knows that he shouldn’t risk cutting while here but… but he can’t stop thinking of how much of a failure he is.

He slices the blade along his wrist, letting the blood drip into the sink. He does more and more, mesmerized.

“Peter? What- what are you doing?”

Peter freezes as Tony’s voice rings through the silent night. “I th-thought you went to bed already.” He whispers.

Tony steps closer, carefully, like if he makes a wrong move Peter with bolt. “What are you doing?”

Peter shakes, pulling the knife closer to himself. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, please-“

Tony steps behind him, lightly taking the knife. He waits for Peter to let go on his own before pulling it away. He hugs Peter from behind.

Peter breaks down into sobs, letting himself be held. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

~

After calming Peter down and getting him to bed, Tony watches the boy sleep. He knows what makes Peter do this. He knows the demons who are hurting his boy.

It breaks his heart.

~

When Peter wakes, Tony is still there.

“I want to show you something.” Tony says.

Peter sits up and curls into a ball. He nods.

Tony pulls his pants down slightly, just enough to expose his hips. And on his hips-

“You cut too?” Peter asks, eyes wide.

Tony nods and pulls his pants back up. “For a long, long time. I only stopped when I started dating Pepper.” He looks down. “Kid… it doesn’t make you weak. It doesn’t make you a bad person. Not everyone has gone through what you went through.” He sits on the bed next to Peter. “I understand why you felt the need to do this but I- I really really hope that… that you don’t anymore. I can help you. If you feel the need to cut, you can come to me. Please Peter? I just- it breaks my heart, knowing you’ve been hurting all alone when I’m right here.”

Peter sobs and throws himself at Tony, hugging him so tightly he’s sure it has to hurt. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry Tony- I promise. I promise I’ll come to you first.”

Tony smiles sadly and holds him. “Thank you, kiddo. I’ll- I’ll help as much as I can, Okay? I love you Pete, I’ll get you through this.” He promsies.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to the first chapter. Peter has a bad day and relapsed.

Thanks to Tony’s help, Peter hasn’t cut in a little over a year. He’s been good. Very good.

Whenever Peter felt the need, he went to Tony. Tony calmed him down, or helped him fight the urge, or just held Peter until the urge passed.

But not today.

Today, Flash bullied him until he cried in the bathrooms. Then he told Peter to go kill himself, save the world the rest of the trouble.

He could have made it, if that was all it was.

But MJ had dumped him That’s morning, before Flash. Said it just wasn’t working out, but they can be friends.

And then his Aunt May got fired because she left her job to talk to Peter too much.

So, not today.

Today he gets in his suit, swings his way to a building that’s high enough no one can see him. He keeps his mask on but presses the button to take the suit itself off, and pulls out his razor blade.

_Stupid faggot. No one is ever going to love you. No wonder MJ left you._

Slice.

_I’m sorry Peter. I just don’t like you that way. I thought I did, but I don’t._

Bigger slice.

_Peter, sweetheart, I lost my job… I shouldn’t have spent so much time checking my phone. I knew you would be okay, and if you weren’t, Tony would come get me. I’m sorry. I’ll try to get a new job, but we might have to move._

Slice slice slice.

Peter sobs loudly, watching the cuts form and bleed and heal through his mask.

“Stupid.” He whispers. “No one will ever love you. No wonder MJ left you. And May lost her job because of you. All you do is disappoint people, you stupid, stupid, stupid boy!” He sobs and slices more and more and more.

“Kid…”

Peter drops the blade, looking up at Tony with wide eyes. Baby monitor protocol… he’s so stupid! God… “M-Mr. Stark…” he whispers.

“You were doing so well…” Tony recedes the suit into his house for it in his chest.

Peter sobs and looks at all the blood. “I’m a complete fuck up. I’ll never be good.”

“Peter…” Tony sits on the roof next to Peter, ignoring that the kid is practically naked for now. His suit lays over his lap, and he’s cross legged.

Peter looks away from him, sniffling. “You heard, then? You heard everything that I’ve done today?”

“That you’ve done? Pete, you haven’t done anything. A lot of bad things happened to you-“

“I made MJ break up with me because I’m bad. I made Flash bully me because I’m bad. I made May lose her job because I’m-“

Tony suddenly stands, shedding his suit jacket.

“M-Mr. Stark?” Peter asks.

Tony takes his button down off too, and his tie. He takes a deep breath and steps forward. “Do you see these scars, right below the reactor?”

Peter swallows thickly and nods. “Y-Yes…”

Tony sighs. “Everyone thinks I got these from Afghanistan. But I did this.” He points to the scars that, now that Peter looks more closely at them, look a bit too uniform to be accidental.

Peter whimpers. “Why-“

“Even Pepper doesn’t know, okay? But listen- after what happened over there, I kept hearing what they were saying. Translated through my cell mate Yinsin. And I saw Yinsin dying, because I couldn’t save him. I saw so many people, dead, because of my weapons. I had nightmares that they came back from the grave and surrounded me, calling me a murderer and-“

Peter hugs Tony, ignoring that they both don’t have much clothes on.

Tony holds him back. “So I cut, here, so people wouldn’t know. And they’re bad. Really bad, they almost killed me because they wouldn’t stop bleeding.”

Peter whimpers. “Tony please…”

Tony smiles and kisses the top of his head. “It gets better. No matter what is your fault or isn’t. No matter how many people die because you couldn’t save them. It gets better. Because you’ll help more people by doing what you’re doing than by not.”

Peter pulls back, sniffling and crying a little. He pulls his suit back up, taking his mask off. “Tony… I’m sorry I didn’t go to you first.”

Tony smiles. “It’s okay kiddo. I know exactly how hard it can be. Just please—know you don’t have to go through this alone. And it will get better. Always. It always gets better.”

Peter nods, wiping his nose and smiling shyly at him. “Thank you, Tony.”

Tony beams. “Any time, kiddo.”


End file.
